1、概要写作示例与写作训练3【写作示例】【原文呈现】阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。Food serves as a form of communication in two fundamental ways. Sharing bread or other foods is a common human tradition that can promote unity and trust. Food can also have a specific meaning, and play a significant role in a family or cultures cele
2、brations or traditions. The foods we eatand when and how we eat themare often unique to a particular culture or may even differ between rural (农村的) and urban areas within one country.Sharing bread, whether during a special occasion (时刻) or at the family dinner table, is a common symbol of togetherne
3、ss. Many cultures also celebrate birthdays and marriages with cakes that are cut and shared among the guests. Early forms of cake were simply a kind of bread, so this tradition hits its roots in the custom of sharing bread.Food also plays an important role in many New Year celebrations. In the south
4、ern United States, pieces of corn bread represent blocks of gold for prosperity (兴旺) in the New Year. In Greece, people share a special cake calledvasilopita. A coin is put into the cake, which signifies (预示) success in the New Year for the person who receives it.Many cultures have ceremonies to cel
5、ebrate the birth of a child, and food can play a significant role. In China, when a baby is one month old, families name and welcome their child in a celebration that includes giving red-colored eggs to guests. In many cultures, round foods such as grapes, bread, and moon cakes are eaten at welcome
6、celebrations to represent family unity.Nutrition is necessary for life, so it is not surprising that food is such an important part of different cultures around the world.【思维路径】核心内容 本文是一篇说明文，全文共分五段。第一段主要讲了食物和文化有着深刻的联系，不同的文化包含着不同的饮食传统和庆祝方式。食物通过这两种基本的方式扮演着沟通的角色。第二段以分享面包为例，说明了分享食物可以促进团结和建立信任。第三段举了两个具体的
7、列子说明食物在庆祝新年时起的重要作用。第四段解释了食物在其他一些庆祝仪式中所扮演的角色，如新生命的诞生，家庭的团聚。第五段总结全文，俗话说，民以食为天，食物在不同文化当中的作用如此之大其实不足为奇。写作思路(1)理清文章脉络、概括段落大意。理清文章脉络、概括段落大意是写摘要的基础，同学们可以通过找主题句、分析段落的逻辑关系来梳理文章的脉络，概括大意。该文第一段的主题句是Food serves as a form of communication in two fundamental ways；第二第三段主题句是段落的首句。第四段没有明显的主题句，但是可以归纳为food plays an imp
8、ortant role in many other ceremonies such as family unity；第五段的整一句句子是本段的主题句。(2)确定表达要点、灵活准确表达。每段的段落大意都是我们要表达的要点，这可以确保不漏点。本文的摘要要把全文第一句作为一个要点，因为它是全文的逻辑起点。在确定表达要点后要思考如何准确灵活表达，这是难点。因为评分标准要求完全使用自己的语言。灵活表达的重要技巧是对原来的语言进行同义替换(paraphrase)，同时要对相关内容进行整合。第一段主要讲了食物作为一种沟通方式对文化起了两种基础性的作用，所以可以将第一段概括成“Food can be a wa
9、y of communication in two basic ways”，是概要当中的要点1,；第二段以分享面包为例，说明了食物可以承载团圆之意，为避免照抄原文，可将原文“is a common symbol of togetherness”转换成“carry the meaning of unity”，为要点2；第三段讲到在新年之际，人们会吃一些特别的食物，比如在蛋糕中放入钱币，这其实是人们将新年的美好愿望承载于食物当中，因此可以表达成“Food bears peoples best wishes”，这一点信息是要点3；第四段是对第三段更进一步的说明，即在其他的一些庆祝仪式上，食物也充当着
10、重要的作用，包含着特定的意义，如文中的两个例子，代表新生命的红鸡蛋和代表家庭团圆的圆形食物，概要当中可将这两点简要概括成要点4。最后一段主要强调了食物对于文化的重要作用取决于它是人类安生立命的必需品，概要中用necessity一词强调了食物的这一作用，为要点5。参考范文 Food can be a way of communication in two basic ways.(要点1)Sharing bread on some special situations carries the meaning of unity. (要点2)In many New Year celebrations,
11、 food bears peoples best wishes such as success and prosperity. (要点3)Moreover, food also plays an significant part in other ceremonies such as family unity and celebrations for the new born.(要点4) As food is such a necessity, it is not surprise to know its vital role in different cultures. (要点5)(76 w
12、ords)范文解析 范文把要点1当中的two fundamental ways替换成two basic ways；要点2省略了文中的具体例子，用unity一词来概括了分享食物这一传统所包含的意义；要点3和要点4都旨在说明在各种庆祝仪式中食物充当的作用，要点4是要点3的补充，所以范文中用了moreover一词，表明递进。原文第三和第四段给出多个例子来支撑短首的中心句，由于受到字数的限制，范文用了几个名词性短语family unity, celebrations for new born, success and prosperity高度概括了文章所给的例子；要点5用necessity替换了原文中
13、的形容词， 用its vital role代替such a important part，含义相同，简洁易懂。提炼归纳 1. 语义转换语义转换是新题型概要写作中很重要的一项基本技能，因为评价标准对“使用自己的语言进行观点的独立表达”有较高的要求。 范文中我们将“团结的象征symbol of togetherness”表达为“meaning of unity”，意义相同，可避免与原文重复。原文第二段和第三段都在讲食物在不同文化中承载的意义，为避免用词单一，范文先后用了carry和bear来表达“承载”的意思。2. 要点整合为了达到概要写作规定的字数，在准确梳理原文要点的基础上，我们需要对原文的观
14、点进行必要的整合，可以帮助我们更简洁、有效地表达。本篇文章主要是通过论点加例子的形式进行论证的，在形成概要的过程中，例子是“茎”，论点是“秆”，论点当中的要点一个都不能少，那么相应的例子必须做到极其的简练概括，范文中family unity, celebrations for new born, success and prosperity等名词性质的短语都是对大篇幅例子的概括处理。【写作演练】1.阅读下面短文,根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要.Parents everywhere praise their kids. Jenn Berman, author of The A to Z G
15、uide to Raising Happy and Confident Kids, says, Weve gone to the opposite extreme of a few decades ago when parents tended to be more strict. By giving kids a lot of praise, parents think theyre building their childrens confidence, when, in fact, it may be just the opposite. Too much praise can back
16、fire and, when given in a way thats insincere, make kids afraid to try new things or take a risk for fear of not being able to stay on top where their parents praise has put them.Still, dont go too far in the other direction. Not giving enough praise can be just as damaging as giving too much. Kids
17、will feel like theyre not good enough or that you dont care and, as a result, may see no point in trying hard for their accomplishments.So what is the right amount of praise? Experts say that the quality of praise is more important than the quantity. If praise is sincere and focused on the effort no
18、t the outcome, you can give it as often as your child does something that deserves a verbal reward. “We should especially recognize our childrens efforts to push themselves and work hard to achieve a goal,” says Donahue, author of Parenting Without Fear: Letting Go of Worry and Focusing on What Real
19、ly Matters. “One thing to remember is that its the process not the end product that matters.”Your son may not be the best basketball player on his team. But if hes out there every day and playing hard, you should praise his effort regardless of whether his team wins or loses. Praising the effort and
20、 not the outcome can also mean recognizing your child when she has worked hard to clean the yard, cook dinner, or finish a book report. But whatever it is, praise should be given on a case-by-case basis and be proportionate(相称的)to the amount of effort your child has put into it._ 2.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60
21、词左右的内容概要。Elephants can tellIt is easy for us to tell our friends from our enemies. But can other animals do the same? Elephants can! They can use their sense of vision and smell to tell the difference between people who pose a threat and those who do not.In Kenya， researchers found that elephants re
22、act differently to clothing worn by men of the Maasai and Kamba ethnic groups. Young Maasai men kill animals and thus pose a threat to elephants； Kamba men are mainly farmers and are not a danger to elephants.In an experiment conducted by animal scientists， elephants were first presented with clean
23、clothing or clothing that had been worn for five days by either a Maasai or a Kamba man. When the elephants recognized the smell of clothing worn by a Maasai man， they moved away from the smell faster and took longer to relax than when they recognized the smells of either clothing worn by a Kamba ma
24、n or clothing that had not been worn at all.Clothing color also plays a role， though in a different way. In the same study， when the elephants saw red clothing not worn before， they reacted angrily， as red is typically worn by Maasai men. Rather than running away as they did with the smell， the elep
25、hants acted aggressively(攻击性地) toward the red clothing.The researchers believe that the elephants emotional reactions are because of their different understanding of the smells and the sights. Smelling a potential danger means that a threat is nearby and the best thing to do is run away and hide. Se
26、eing a potential threat without its smell means that risk is low. Therefor， instead of showing fear and running away， the elephants express their anger and become aggressive._3.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。Why is Americas Milk Industry in so much trouble?For much of The 20th century, milk was a simple
27、part of daily life in the U. S. , as farmers raised cows, milkmen delivered bottles and children drank it at school. But those days are fadinga fact emphasized by the announcement on Jan. 5 by Borden Dairy, a milk processor, that it is filing for bankruptcy protection. Borden, which said it was impa
28、cted by “market challenges facing the dairy industry,” follows Dean Foods, Americas largest milk producer, which filed for bankruptcy protection in November.America has fallen out of love with drinking milk and people are substituting water bottles for milk cartons. The downturn has been tough on da
29、iry processors like Borden and Dean, which buy fresh milk from farms and use techniques like pasteurization(加热杀菌法) to create a consumer-safe beverage with a longer shelf life. For the past five years, thanks to technology that increased milk production, fresh-milk prices were relatively low. But pri
30、ces began ticking up again last year, squeezing the processors already tight margins. “Declining sales in a thinmargin business is not a good recipe for success,” says Mark Stephenson, director of dairy policy analysis at the University of Wisconsin. (Americans are still eating cheese, butter and ic
31、e cream, but fluid-milk processors such as Dean and Borden arent big players in those businesses.)Milk processors are also facing competition from big retailers, which have set up their own processing plants. In 2018, Walmart opened a milkprocessing plant in Indiana to serve hundreds of stores in th
32、e Midwest, taking away approximately 95 million gal. of milkprocessing business from Dean Foods.On the other end of the supply chain, dairy farms are facing trouble of their own. The low prices that were a benefit to processors left small farmers struggling across the industry. The number of Chapter
33、 12 farm bankruptcies in 2019 was up 24% from the previous year. “Were trying our best to hang on,” says Mary Rieckmann, a dairy farmer in Wisconsin whose family has turned to GoFundMe to keep their centuryold farm running._ 4.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。On November 18, 1995, Itzhak Perlman, the world
34、 famous violinist, came on stage to give a concert at Lincoln Centre in New York City. If you have ever been to a Perlmans concert, you know that getting on stage is not easy for him. He got polio(小儿麻痹症) as a child, and has to walk with the aid of two crutches(拐杖) now.That night Perlman walked slowl
35、y to his chair. Then he sat down and began to play. But, suddenly, one of the strings on his violin broke, You could hear it breakit broke with a loud noise. People thought to themselves, He will have to get up to either find another violin or find another string for this one. But he didnt. Instead,
36、 he waited a moment, closed his eyes and then signaled the conductor to begin again. The orchestra began, and he played from where he had stopped. He played with such passion and such power. Of course, everyone knows that it is impossible to play a symphonic work with just three strings. But that ni
37、ght Itzhak Perlman refused to know that. You could see him changing and recomposing the piece in his headWhen he finished, there was a silence in the room. Then people rose and cheered. We were all on our feet, doing everything we could to show how much we appreciated what he had done. He smiled and
38、 then he said in a quiet tone, You know, sometimes it is the artists task to find out how much music you can make with what you have left.”His words have stayed in my mind ever since I heard them. That is also the way of life. Perhaps our task in this quickly changing world in which we live is to ma
39、ke music, at first with all that we have, and then, when that is no longer possible, to make music with what we have left._5.阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇60词左右的内容概要。If you havent seen or heard anything about Road Rage (路怒) in the last few months, youve probably been avoiding the media. There have been countless s
40、tories about this new and scary phenomenon, considered a type of aggressive driving. Youve most likely encountered aggressive driving or Road Rage recently if you drive.Why is this phenomenon occurring more than ever now and why is it something that seemed almost nonexistent a few short years ago? E
41、xperts have certain theories and all are probably partially correct. One suggestion is overcrowding. In the last decade, the number of the cars on the roads has increased by more than 11 percent, and the number of miles driven has increased by 35 percent. However, the number of new road miles has on
42、ly increased by 1 percent. That means more cars in the same amount of space; and the problem is even serious in urban areas. Also, people have less time and more things to do. With people working and trying to fit extra chores and activities into the day, street levels have never been higher. Stress
43、 creates anxiety, which leads to short tempers. These factors, when combined in certain situations, can cause Road Rage.You may think you are the last person who would drive aggressively, but you might be surprised. For instance, have you ever yelled out loud at a slower driver, sounded the horn lon
44、g and hard at another car, or sped up to keep another driver from passing? If you recognize yourself in any of these situations, watch out!Whether you are getting angry at other drivers, or another driver is visibly upset with you, there are things you can do to avoid any major conflict. If you are easily influenced to Road Rage, the key is to discharge your emotion in a healthy way. If you are the target of another drivers rage, do everything possible to get away from the other driver safely, including avoiding eye contact and getting out of their way._
