1、10 10 励志故事励志故事 20212021 年中考英语书面表达高分作文攻略（全国通用版）年中考英语书面表达高分作文攻略（全国通用版） 素材储备与写作指导素材储备与写作指导 “励志奋斗”的话题在模考及中考的作文中也是屡见不鲜，“ work hard I never give up”等字眼都是这类文 章的提示词。内容取材是比较容易的，人人都会有面对困难的时候，而学生所面临的困难无非是学习上停 滞不前、朋友间存在误会、师生间发生摩擦、与父母意 见不合、生活道理理解不透等等。但是有困难也必定会有解决办法，安么是学生自己领悟，要么是别 人施以授手。总之。在结构安排上，最后都会回归到克展因难、奋斗排搏
2、的主题上语言方面，在平时要注 意这类词汇表达的积累。 以下就用一个具体案例来分析如何写好类似文章。 实践案例实践案例 题目题目 Write a composition in at least 60 words on“ 给予我力量”的短文，字数不得少于 60 个词。)gave me power. (写一篇题为在你的生活和学习中，肯定 有过困难的时刻。在这样的时刻中，是什么给子了你力量，让你不放弃、不气馁并且坚持不懈地奋斗下去 呢?请具体描述这样的时刻，讲述你如何获得力量、取得成功。 这篇半命题作文对审题的能力要求比较高，不仔细审题很有可能偏离话题、选错题材。从题目上就能 看出来时态是过去时， 再
3、加上“具体描述这样的时刻”的要求， 就更能确定这篇文章的重点在于描述一件过去 发生的事情，在这个事件中要有困难产生、克服困难这样一个转折的过程，因此选材一定要注意选择态度 积极向 上的话题，将其写成记叙文。然面叙事文章都是以借叙事来抒情，所以结尾部分注意要有表决心、 话奋斗的励志语言。 段落结构段落结构 根据题目要求，可以参考以下结构进行写作: 第一部分 The 1st part 补充题目，开篇点题。 Encouragement / Love / Patience/ Hope . gave me power when I met with difficulties. . once helped
4、 me solve problems because it provided me with strong power. 第二部分 The2ndpart 描述过去发生的一次励志经历 。 Once, there was a difficult situation in which I had no idea what to do.When I was at the age of. 1 overcame the difficulties successfully just because . gave me power. 第三部分 The 3rd part 表达愿望或信心作为总结，首尾呼应。 Be
5、cause of .1 am more confident now. Thanks to the power from . am not afraid of. any more. 核心语汇核心语汇 “disadvantage 1 shortcoming 缺点、不足 .my ability to do 我做.的能力 be satisfied / pleased with 对.满意 make up ones mind to do .下定决心做. . decide to do ./my decision to do .决定做. Be good at do well in 擅长. make progr
6、ess in .方面取得进步 make efforts to do .努力做. take action to do .采取行动. further improve .进一步改. overcome difficulties 克服困难 have confidence in .对.有信心 thanks to .多亏. cheer . up 鼓舞某人 solve / work out the problem 解决问题 face / meet with 1 come across the difficulty 面对/遇到困难 difficulties and frustrations 困难和挫折 unde
7、r a lot of pressure 在巨大压力下 参考句型参考句型 . . is a kind of power which pushes me forward. .是一种能促我前进的力量。 . can help me overcome the difficulties.能帮助我克服困难。 . make it possible/ easier to do .使做.有可能更容易 . plays an important role and can give me power.作用重大，能给予我力量。 . were just like a stream flowing into my heart
8、 cleaning up all my pains. 如.股清泉流人我心、 去我所痛。 I believe that the more I try, the better I will be. 我相信我会越挫越勇。 I will succeed as long as I have a willing heart 只要有心，我定成功。 习作习作 1 My dream gave me power Life was full of ups and downs, so it is very common for me to meet with some difficulties and frustra
9、tions. At such moments, it was dream that gave me power to hang in there instead of giving up. For example, when I failed in an exam, 1 wouldnt be upset for a long time because my dream pushed me forward to make efforts. Where there is a will, there is a way. My dream plays an important role in my l
10、ife and I believe my dream will eventually come true. 点评点评: 这篇习作看似文字优美，但在内容的选择上不是很恰当。文章并没有记叙过去某一时刻发生的事情， 没有“具体描述这样的时刻”，只提供了一个for example 来泛泛而谈，并无代表性，这是审题上的失误。 另外，“我的梦想给予我力量”也并没有合乎逻辑地表述出来，“梦想”是什么也没有具体表述。从这篇习作可 以看出，它虽有一一定的语言优势(用词漂亮，基本无错)，但内容处理不当，读起来抓不住要点。所以，要 在内容抓准的前提下，再提高自己的语言修养，才是中考作文得分的法宝。 修改稿修改稿 M
11、y dream gave me power In a Junior Three students life, difficulties and frustrations are unavoidable. At such moments, it was my dream 一 to get accepted by a key senior high school 一 that gave me power. Last Wednesday, I had a cold. After the tests at school, I got back home so tired and exhausted t
12、hat I didnt want to do my homework. But I thought of my dream which needed my hard work to be realized. It gave me enough power to abandon my excuse and finish my homework perfectly. h Where there is a will, there is a way. My dream plays an important role in my life and I believe my dream will even
13、tually come true with my strong will. 习作习作 2 Encouragement gave me power Encouragement is a kind of magic power that can help me overcome difficulties. I didnt realize that until last year when I failed in the mid-term exam. I was so upset and frustrated that I refused to talk to anyone. My teacher
14、came to comfort me, One failure doesnt mean anything. Believe in yourself. I know you can make it. Her encouragement really worked. I got the first place in the final exam. Thanks to my teacher and her encouragement, I have not only more power but also more confidence now. 点评:这篇习作相较于上面一-篇， 从内容上来说就更为
15、得体，开头结尾非常清晰，间部分的叙事简短 明了，考试失利一老师鼓励-重拾信心扭转格局，这样的叙事清时有力，能让人读完很快明白，“鼓励” 确实 在此事件中发挥了极大的作用“给予我大量”。 从语言上来说， 这篇范文和上面一篇有类似之处， 会用 frustrated 等些比较好的表达，也会用定语从句、so . that 结构，不简单也不繁冗，多用这样的表达和结构，中考作就 比较完美了，不需要太多华丽的辞藻，那样反而累赘。 相关话题优秀范文解析相关话题优秀范文解析 书面表达 Write at least 60 words on the topic My progress （以进步了为题， 写一篇不少于
16、 60 个词的短文， 标点符号不占格。） 你在生活或学习中一定取得过不少进步，比如生活技能的获得、学习方法的掌握、良好习慣的养成。 请选取其中一个方面，结合自身经历，谈一谈你是如何取得这一进步的。 注意：短文中不得出现任何人名、校名及其它相关信息，否则不予评分。 The following is for reference only （以下表达仅供参考） used to do/betry my best to domake progress in( doing) _ _ _ 考题解析考题解析 2018 年上海卷中考作文仍沿袭近几年中考作文命题的趋势，关注自我成长，仍然从第一人称我出 发，考题十
17、分贴近学生的成长经历和真实情感。写作主题突出传递正能量，力求学生发现生活中积极的一 面，考察学生用英语表达自己思想的能力。相较过去，我有什么进步？My progress可以是学习生活技 能上的，也可以是个人习惯上的，学生需思考自身通过怎样的努力实现了自我的进步与成长。 满分范文满分范文 I used to write badly, especially in English. It affected my performance every composition. I felt annoyed because I didnt know how to do it. Several months
18、 ago, our English teacher reminded us to pay attention to our English Writing. He prepared a copybook for each student. We were asked to practice every day. I tried my best to copy well. The teacher encouraged me and kept on telling me what to do next. With the help of my English teacher, I made pro
19、gress in writing. No pains no gains. I will study hard to achieve greater progress and I believe I will do better and better. 【名师点评】【名师点评】 本文属于写人叙事类话题类作文，话题是My progress。主要根据自身的经历，谈谈如何取得进步 的，具体内容可以围绕生活技能的获得、学习方法的掌握、良好习慣的养成方面去写。所给范文写了自己 在英语书写方面的进步，人称是第一人称，讲述的是已经发生的事情，所以用一般过去时，在文章结 尾作者表达自己以后会更加努力，取得更大的
20、进步，所以用一般将来时。全文采用 WhatHowConclusion的三步写作思路来完成，条理清楚，结构完整，语言简洁明了。 本文第一段作者先引出话题，说自己在书写方面做的不好，但自己不知如何改进，I felt annoyed because I didnt know how to do it. 为下文自己在书写方面的进步作出铺垫，思路清晰。第二段主要叙述了 自己是如何取得进步的过程。几个月前，在英语老师的帮助下，自己取得了很大的进步，交代清楚了事情 发生的时间，人物，经过，结果符合叙事类作文的基本要点。作者采用时间状语 Several months ago，动词 短语 pay attenti
21、on to，介词短语 With the help of 简要清楚地表达了自己进步的经历，语言朴实无华，却能阐 明事情的经过。第三段主要是升华主题，表达自己在未来会更加努力学习，取得更大的进步， I will study hard to achieve greater progress and I believe I will do better and better.。谚语No pains no gains.使用恰当 准确，为文章在结尾添彩。 本文的体裁为议论文，根据所给图片和提示可知，文章要求介绍图中的两个主人公在做什么？其次谈 论当你看到人们像这样扔垃圾时你怎么做？以及为什么这么做的理由。
22、描述图片内容，男人的行为和女士 的说话内容概括，要注意用现在进行时态。 叙述当你看到这种行为该怎么做，写出自己的建议和做法，并 陈述理由。这是文章详写的部分，引入到环保的话题中。本文涵盖了材料中的所有内容，行文流畅，合理 运用恰当的连接词，逻辑思路清晰。 相关话题满分作文必背相关话题满分作文必背 （一）（一） Write a passage of at least 60 words on the topic Im not. . any more.(以“我不.为题，写一篇不少于 60 个 词的短文，标点符号不占格。)要求:补全作文标题。(短 文中不得出现考生的姓名、校名及其他相关信息， 否则不子
23、评分。) 范文范文 Im not a child any more I used to be dependent and weak. But now I am a Junior Three student. I have change and the most important change for me is that I have learnt to take care of myself. Last week, my parents were on a business trip. I chose to stay at home alone instead of asking my g
24、randparents for help. I set the alarm oclock every morning to make sure wouldnt be late for school. I did my homework in time and went to bed after that. All my clothes were kept clean and I even tried to cook on the weekend. When my parents came back, they were glad to know that I could take good c
25、are of myself. I am satisfied with myself too., Im not a child any more and I have been more careful and independent. I believe I can do better in the future. （二）（二） Write a passage in at least 60 words on the topic“I want to say to myself “我想对自己说”为题， 写一篇不少于 60 个字的短文，标点符号不占格。)(注意:短文中不得出现任何人 名，校名及其他相
26、关信息，否则不予评分。) Questions for reference (以下问题仅供参考) 1. What would you like to say to yourself? 2. Why do you want to say these words to yourself? 3. What do those words or sentences mean to you? 范文范文 I want to say to myself Hold on to your dream” Hod on to your dream. 1 whisper the encouraging sentence
27、to myself from time to time. Im firmly convinced that nothing in the world can take the place of ones dream. Amy dream is to become a surgeon, these words can provide me with courage to study harder and energy to fight for it. Thanks to these words, no matter how difficult life is, I never give up my hope. Hold on to your dream means persistence and determination to me, so would like to say it to myself again and again.